halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
