put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
