Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
