A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
