I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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