If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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