so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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