My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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