I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
there was a trapeze. enough said
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
