you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
