is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
