if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
