he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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