sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
