dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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