margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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