I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
another moral hangover. fuck.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
