It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
He felt like a one man threesome
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
