Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I have feelings that need drinking.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
