I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
