Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
