your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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