Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
