I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I wish there were birth control emojis
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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