where am i from again
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Randomize
