You're so nebulous sometimes
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
