Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
