I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
