I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize