We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Randomize
