Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
