The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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