Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I am available for nakedness
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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