Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
