SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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