And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
