no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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