I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
