my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
