just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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