U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
