I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
