Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Randomize
