I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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