No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Randomize
