Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
