I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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