dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
It's shark week go big or go home
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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