it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
