i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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