WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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